When you have someone by you that is supposed to be your spouse/partner/significant other/etc that doesn't (after almost 4 yrs now) attempt to understand and does things or says things without realizing it (the truth seeping out of them) has happened, even when you pinpoint it immediately after and it is blatantly DENIED of having been done.... WHAT does one do?
When your new drs coming on board your team DON'T listen, when it… read more
Hey Brett. If you are at the point I think you are, I think person above is right; you need to step away and take that time for yourself to just regroup, build some energy back up, and assess what your next steps might be. Taking a moment to breathe and meditate every day might be of some value to you if you are into that. I myself am terrible at meditation but I still give it a go, and it helps.
Dealing with that sort of daily battle will drain you so fast. I was where you are a few years ago; doctors were telling me I was a hypochondriac, partner just thought I was lazy, work thought I was taking the piss, and friends, well friends just wrote me off. I can't fathom going back to that, I'm so sorry that's where you are at right now. Please know that you have friends right here that understand and believe in your pain. It is real, and so are the other million bloody symptoms this thing throws at us.
Re: doctors. I have a very good doctor now that does listen, but it took years to find him, by the time I found him I was at the point that I was going to make my own treatments decisions and I just needed his guidance and assistance and knowledge to do it. This works well for me now, but it took years of just doing what all the doctors said and getting sicker every time, that I just got fed up. You know your body better than any doctor so you have the control. Re: your partner. It's hard to make partners and loved ones understand. My partner realised recently that she will never fully understand what it's like, but as long as she is supportive and believes in me, then we will be ok, and I will be ok too. She started out not believing I was suffering as much as I said I was, not understanding any of it, and just locked in this headspace of "everyone is built the same, you just need to stop taking meds, or go for a run every day, or eat better, or do more, etc etc". Eventually I started taking her to some of my doctors appointments so she could start to understand that it is a real thing, and I can't just "do" all that stuff to fix it. She did her own research aswell and now she is my best support. People fear what they don't understand. It may not seem like your partner fears this, but perhaps whatever she is projecting comes from an underlying fear, that this could be real and that makes both of your futures uncertain or less rosie.
But take some time away from it all and just gather your thoughts, give yourself a break from the forever battle, and see what comes to you.
I don't know if this is you - but eventually everyone is brought to their limit. Some people call it "rock bottom" if they are addicts or "to their knees" if they've been through the worst suffering in their lives. If you are at this point you have choices. You can withdraw to a safer vantage point if possible. Sometimes that choice is made for you (as it was for me). Suddenly everything I cared for was stripped away and all I had left was myself, and sometime later I realized I wasn't by myself, but my Creator was there with me. So I clung to Him for my very life, and in rather quick fashion things improved. You don't have to accept any manmade religion. Just look first inside to find that connection. Just the act of asking for help from Something greater than yourself plugs you into a power that is not of you but of something else that is All-Wise and All-Knowing. You don't have to take my word for it. Either way, we are all here for you.
I have times that my family doesn't understand...STILL! But it has gotten much better over the last 21 years. You have to take it one day at a time and don't push yourself so hard. Sure, I have cancelled and told someone that I can't go do so and so, and it makes me sad. I have a great doctor and he listens. I had one that gave me diagnosis after diagnosis that were wrong. I still hear from my kids and husband sometimes that "you're just getting old!" I think they forget sometimes.
Blessings my friend .. you take time out step away - bring yourself back into presence and Breatheee. Ground in nature and above all pray and go within . There lay the answers . ❤️🙏Love and light
Because fibro is most of the time an "invisible illness" people around us tend to forget or not see how much in pain or tired we are. In the last year I have started to be much more open with my family and friends about how I feel. I also show them this website. My husband is also coming with me to doctor's apt. It took years for them to fully understand how I was feeling but part of it was also because I suffered in silence.