When I was a child I taught myself how to deal with terrifying nightmares. I didn't know until I became an adult that what I taught myself had a name; lucid dreaming. In lucid dreaming the conscious mind begins to control the dream to change control of the situation from the dream to the dreamer. For instance, if I'm being chased by someone, I give myself a gun and turn on the offender. The dream usually ends there. The mind is a phenomenal masterpiece and we can learn to control different levels of it. I hope this works for you. I haven't had a horrible dream in a long time.

I have vivid dreams, every night. I'm very active in my sleep which makes for a very restless night, but not sure I'd call them nightmares.

Thanks, Karen. Your words are quite meaningful. My childhood memories were latent. My marital abuse of course seems raw when such a subject comes up. I have had counseling for my PTSD. My med team is amazing and we try to limit meds because I have serious side-effects and bad interactions. Right now everything is working well. I take Cymbalta and we are very happy with the results; and Viibryd (if you've heard of it) boosts the anti-depressant for me. As needed I take diazepam for anxiety. Because my mom was a dr.-prescribed addict, I have a reall aversion to taking anything that isn't absolutely necessary. Mostly, thank you for your words that it was not my fault and I have value and worth. I do know that BUT to hear it from someone who knows and understands is so validating. By the way, I didn't know there was a name for staying awake to avoid nightmares: hypervigilance. MyFibroTeam has been so helpful and educational. I knew if I posed my question that someone would be able to help! Lots of gentle hugs to you!

I have to agree with doctor. I had similar experiences only not in the same way. I did have it affect my marriages though. M first marriage helped contribute though by physical abuse. I still g through mental times when I have to have a sit down with myself. I went through 3 husbands before I found one that didn't take advantage of it. I have found it best to talk to those who have been through some of the same. It does help. When you keep it inside, that's where it stays.
Gentle hugs.

Karen, you are so right. I agree with every word. I have a firm belief that what we go through--whatever it has been--is intended to be used for good. As a Christian, I still struggled with forgiveness--toward myself and those who hurt me. Finally, I was able to give it all to God. I will continue to work through the nightmares, and they are getting fewer and farther between. And I am learning so much through the advice and support of this community. Glad to know we are not alone, to be validated, and to be able to move forward, not to look back. You are wonderful! Many thanks! And hugs!