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A MyFibroTeam Member asked a question 💭
Ellwood City, PA

So my mom hasnt come around to me having fibromyalgia, she doesn't acknowledge that I really have it. she doesnt understand it or the pain of it. Any suggestions of how I could talk to her about it and make her open up to it??

June 23, 2015
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Answer Summary

Members rallied around someone struggling to help their mom understand fibromyalgia, with many sharing a powerful poem titled 'My Name is... Read more

Members rallied around someone struggling to help their mom understand fibromyalgia, with many sharing a powerful poem titled 'My Name is Fibromyalgia' that describes the invisible yet debilitating nature of the condition in a way that resonates deeply with those who live with it. Several members suggested practical approaches like taking mom to doctor appointments, sharing educational articles, or having her read the community's explanations, while acknowledging the painful reality that family members often remain in denial or grow tired of hearing about chronic pain, even when they love you. A recurring theme was the emotional toll of feeling dismissed or misunderstood by those closest to you, with members finding solace in knowing that others with fibromyalgia truly get it when family cannot.

A MyFibroTeam Member

MY NAME IS FIBROMYALGIA
by Terri Been

Hi....My Name is Fibromyalgia, and I'm an Invisible Chronic Illness. I
am now velcroed to you for life. Others around you can't see me or hear me,
but YOUR body feels me. I can attack you anywhere and anyhow I please.
I can cause severe pain or, if I'm in a good mood, I can just cause you to
ache all over.

Remember when you and Energy ran around together and had fun?
I took Energy from you, and gave you Exhaustion. Try to have fun now! I
also took Good Sleep from you and, in its place, gave you Brain Fog. I can
make you tremble internally or make you feel cold or hot when everyone else
feels normal. Oh, yeah, I can make you feel anxious or depressed, too. If you
have something planned, or are looking forward to a great day, I can take
that away, too. You didn't ask for me. I chose you for various reasons:
That virus you had that you never recovered from, or that car accident,
or maybe it was the years of abuse and trauma. Well, anyway, I'm here to stay!

I hear you're going to see a doctor who can get rid of me. I'm rolling
on the floor, laughing. Just try. You will have to go to many, many doctors
until you find one who can help you effectively. You will be put on pain pills,
sleeping pills, energy pills, told you are suffering from anxiety or depression,
given a TENs unit, get massaged, told if you just sleep and exercise properly I
will go away, told to think positively, poked, prodded, and MOST OF ALL, not
taken as seriously as you feel when you cry to the doctor how debilitating life
is every day.

Your family, friends and coworkers will all listen to you until they
just get tired of hearing about how I make you feel, and that I'm a debilitating
disease. Some of they will say things like "Oh, you are just having a bad day" or
"Well, remember, you can't do the things you use to do 20 YEARS ago", not
hearing that you said 20 DAYS ago. Some will just start talking behind your
back, while you slowly feel that you are losing your dignity trying to make them
understand, especially when you are in the middle of a conversation with a
"Normal" person, and can't remember what you were going to say next!

In closing, (I was hoping that I kept this part a secret), but I guess you already
found out...the ONLY place you will get any support and understanding in dealing
with me is with Other People With Fibromyalgia.
Have her read this and then ask her if she is willing to learn more. Best of luck Giant hugs

June 23, 2015
A MyFibroTeam Member

That's really good! Unfortunately, people will never understand. I don't understand it myself! Communicating with others has really helped me. Hugs💜💚

June 23, 2015
A MyFibroTeam Member

My mom lives with me. She has health problems too. But with all of it she still doesn't understand how Fibro really affects me. I know she doesn't mean to but she can put me on a guilt trip that makes me do stuff I shouldn't and flare afterward. It ends up being a vicious cycle. Family is the worst for understanding unless they have Fibro too. My sister does

June 23, 2015
A MyFibroTeam Member

Despite being a nurse, I feel like a professional patient in the treatment of my fibro/fatigue and pain issues!

June 24, 2015
A MyFibroTeam Member

Try having her read some of the articles written about it. Maybe take her with you to one of your DR. appointments so the DR. can explain it to her better. I hope she comes around. We all need support, especially from those closest to us.

June 23, 2015

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